Addiction

Tomorrow will probably the last day that person will be around. I've been thinking about it. Telling that person how I feel, that I like that person. I have so many things on my mind that I again cried like a pathetic person. What I was thinking? I mean I know I like that person, I know that person is someone dear for me, and I don't ever want to lose that person. I feel that person is too precious, that person is the glue for sometime. I mean that person was the first one who really made me feel welcomed. I like to see the smile, that sparkly eyes, that warm warm greetings, that warm conversation, even if I never really converse that deep that led me to know that person.
We parted to a different way just then, I can't help to look back and see that person, even if it's just the back. I can't help to wonder if he turned around. I sometimes like to see if he's looking at my direction, but I can't be sure.
I've been reading about Andersen's Fairy Tale, and I feel that I'm in the little mermaid story, where I'm the little mermaid and bound to have an unhappy ending.
Then I think about it, if I told that person, there's a possibility that I'm gonna lose that person, there's a possibility of being awkward, and I don't want that to happen. Will I be the mute mermaid who won't be able to deliver her own feelings and ended up as foam? I'm scared, I prayed, but I still don't know, I know that God will give the best for me, I know that He would prefer me having something that I need, I know that He knows that I don't want to lose that person. I'm hopeless, I'm pathetic in this matter, and I can only hope it will turn into something beautiful.
One thing I know about me is that when I see something that is really dear, really precious for me I'd walked, I'd go around the world for that person.
The thing that worries me besides that is my friends. Are they used to me being around, or do they still think negatively of me? I wonder what they think, about me hanging around with them. I feel that they don't really accept me. I know that I had my time of addiction to them, and it's unhealthy and that's probably why they're like the way they are now. This leads to another question, I do hope this feeling that I'm feeling is not an addiction. I don't want to hurt anyone, and I don't want to hurt myself.
I had enough share of hurt in this matter and I don't plan on adding more. Also another thing in my mind is that usually these things I said, those things that I told someone, that I told my friends ended up in the sad way, and I really don't know about now.